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Benellis58 GIB bashing on repeat Groundhog Day

#741 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-04, 19:34

Mandated auction, meaning that GIBBO recommends this bidding and figures it's all absolutely perfect...including the I.D.I.O.T.I.C. 4C bid by North.

GIBBO robots bid like Pete Townshend's "Tommy", a "deaf, dumb, and blind boy", but at least Tommy was a "pinball wizard". From what I've seen, the GIBBO robots have no talents of any kind.

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#742 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-04, 19:48

This board was played 13 times and all 13 times the result was identical: 3NT down 2 by South.

The auction and lead were mandated, which means that the auction is RECOMMENDED by GIBBO and GIBBO thinks this is exactly how all four hands should be bid. Thus, this provides further proof of how everlastingly hopeless GIBBO is at bidding. GIBBO rots!

Why the HELL would South pass 3NT rather than bidding 4H when he has three=card heart support and the worthless 97 of clubs? Answer: Because he does not have even the FOGGIEST idea of how to bid.

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#743 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-04, 20:02

The GIBBO robot "defends" as "well" as usual. He ducks the first club (probably unwisely), wins the second, and later PITCHES a club, allowing declarer to take an "impossible" 3 club tricks - "impossible", that is against a DECENT defender, but obviously QUITE possible against a typically inept GIBBO one.

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#744 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 04:38

Here is another hand where the auction and lead were mandated, which means that the auction is RECOMMENDED by GIBBO and that GIBBO thinks this is exactly how all four hands should be bid.

This is another hand where we see how mind-blowingly and utterly HOPELESS the GIBBO robots are at bidding and how ASTOUNDINGLY pathetic the GIB definitions are!

The final contract of 6H is fine. It's cold for exactly 12 tricks and it succeeds...BUT...let's look at the final three bids and definitions of the auction, which will expose its insanity:

First of the three: North's 5S: "Signoff - 5+ spades; 11 HCP; 12+ total points". North CHOSE, rightly or wrongly, to bid keycard Blackwood for spades. South showed zero or three keys, but on the auction, it MUST be three...so why is North now signing off? Was he playing "CHICKEN Blackwood"? Also, he has only NINE HCP, not the ELEVEN "promised" by the definition. But the KEY part of the definition is the word "Signoff". Rightly or wrongly, he wants his partner South to...PASS 5S. So, what does South do? He DOESN'T pass. He DOESN'T respect his partner North's command. He BREAKS the cardinal rule that whoever bids Blackwood is the "captain", because the Blackwood bidder KNOWS how many keys the combined partnership has, but the responder does NOT know. So, WHATEVER the result turns out to be (even if it turns out to be GOOD that South bids on, as it WAS good here), South, by bidding, is being a BAD "partner" and on many hands will be WRONG. South bids 5NT, which is...

Second of the three: South's 5NT: "5+ hearts; 3+ spades; 18+ HCP; biddable clubs; 19-20 total points". That actually describes his HAND well, BUT: First, he was SUPPOSED to PASS, not make another bid. Second, and most importantly, what the HELL is 5NT actually supposed to MEAN? Is it to PLAY, asking North to pass? Is it a Grand Slam Force, asking North to bid a grand with two of the top three spades (or some variation thereof, depending on the GIBBO system)?. Is it "Pick a slam" asking his partner to bid six in whatever strain North feels is best? Who KNOWS what it is (?), because the typically USELESS and HOPELESS GIB definition doesn't say that one CRUCIAL piece of information!

Third of the three: North's 6H: "Cue bid - 1+ club; 1+ diamond; 5+ spades; 11 HCP; no ace of clubs; no ace of diamonds; ace of hearts; 12 total points; forcing". Let's go to a new paragraph to examine the MASSIVE insanity of this call and definition:

North earlier asked his "partner" South to pass. South broke ALL rules of logic, trust, and partnership bidding by NOT passing, but by bidding 5NT - a call that the totally USELESS GIB definition did not adequately define. NOW North, who wanted to END the auction in 5S...does not pass 5NT (which on this layout would not have been a success) but somehow now ...CUEBIDS ???!!! He also repeats his earlier LIE about having "11 HCP" despite having only 9. He PROMISES the ace of hearts - which he does NOT have! AND the bid of SIX hearts is apparently "forcing" - even though he earlier wanted to sign off in FIVE spades. But let's focus on that word "forcing", because it means that...North's "partner" South is now supposed to bid SOMETHING - he is NOT supposed to pass. So, what does South do? He...

PASSES! He makes the one and only call his "partner" North asked him NOT to make! He DISOBEYS his "partner" for the second time in a row! When his "partner" asked him to PASS, he...BID (5NT) and now, when his "partner" asks him to BID, he...PASSES!

Also, Note that the partnership had earlier agreed on SPADES and North had Blackwooded in SPADES, yet they end up playing in...HEARTS...in their five-TWO fit rather than their five-THREE. They luck out, as both 6H and 6S are cold for exactly 12 tricks, but that does NOT mean that their auction was good. The auction AND the definitions were REPULSIVELY bad...as BOTH so OFTEN are!

How the HELL can GIB definitions AND GIBBO bidding be so completely, disgustingly, horrendously incompetent? As I have said on several occasions, I have nothing but contempt for the GIB definitions and the GIBBO robots. The really interesting thing, though, is that I have had this scorn ever since the first time I ever encountered them, almost 9 years ago, and that scorn has INCREASED...EVERY time I have played...because EVERY time I play, I see them do something INCREDIBLY stupid!

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#745 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 04:47

Another hideous mandated auction. Why wouldn't North make a penalty double of 4S? Maybe double would not be for penalties in the GIBBO system?

But in any case, why did South stupidly and unilaterally bid 5C instead of doubling, which would be far more flexible and would cater to a NS contract in clubs, diamonds, or hearts...as WELL as to a penalty pass by North?

The GIBBO robots...ROT!

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#746 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 05:00

East's double is defined as "4+ spades; 10+ HCP; biddable hearts; 10- total points".

East's hand is A92,73,J87543,A3.

Let's compare the definition to his hand:

"4+ spades". He has only three.

"10+ HCP". He has only nine.

"Biddable hearts". 73 doubleton is "biddable"???!!! In which sick, twisted universe?

"10- total points". "Total" points can be equal to or greater than HCP, Mr. GIB, but they CANNOT be less, so it's about time you learned that and stopped spewing your incorrect nonsense suggesting that the reverse is true.

Garbage, as usual!

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#747 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 05:12

The definition of 3H promises "12 total points", which is silly. Not exactly a surprise that a GIB definition says something silly!

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#748 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 05:39

The typically pathetic GIB definition of West's highly questionable 4D bid very helpfully (ha, HA, HA!) informs the world that it shows "32- HCP". No KIDDING? So...he COULD have ZERO...OR he COULD have 32. Thanks, Mr. GIB. That's SO useful! You've narrowed his strength down to a...THIRTY-THREE POINT range! Terrific! We ALREADY know that he can't have 33! So VERY useful! (What a pathetic, ever-present JOKE the GIB definitions are!)

Then...East's 4H bid is defined as "Cue bid - 2-3 clubs; 2-3 diamonds; 5 hearts; 2-3 spades; 19- HCP; ace of hearts; 22 total points; partial stop in clubs; partial stop in diamonds". Let's examine, piece by piece, some of the TRASH that appears here:

"Cue bid". Why the HELL should it be a cue bid? What if he wants to...PLAY IN 4H?

"5 hearts". WHY? Yes, I'm aware that his previous call was 3NT, which ALSO erroneously claimed he had five hearts, but why on Earth can't he have six, as, in fact, he DID on this hand? His 2NT bid was an IDEAL description of his hand DESPITE what the stupid GIB definition considers the terrible SIN of having a sixth heart.

"Ace of hearts". WHY? What if he wanted to play in 4H even without having the ace?

"22 total points". Where the Hell was this figure MAGICALLY (and for absolutely NO reason) pulled from? Why should it show EXACTLY 22? And notice that his actual hand is NOT worth 22 "total" points.

AND...if it's a "Cue bid", as the worthless definition foolishly claims, then why on Earth did West...PASS it?

Garbage as usual from the GIB definitions and the bidding of the GIBBO robots.

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#749 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 06:29

For this one, let's begin by looking at some of the TRULY annoying GIB definitions before moving on to the typically ineffective GIBBO bidding.

1C begins with the words "Minor suit opening". Oh, REALLY? Thanks SO much for telling us!

1S begins with the words "Free bid; new suit". Wow! Terrific! Another PRICELESS bit of information that we NEVER would have figured out if you hadn't told us!

2C begins with the words "Opener rebids clubs". Golly gee, now I'm SUPER impressed! How did you EVER figure out that he was rebidding ...clubs, GIB? You're SO smart!

2D begins with the words "New suit". GIB, your ASTONISHING brilliance continues to amaze me. "New suit", huh? What gave it away?

Now the bidding:

I realize that it often pays to get into the bidding before the opponents, and I can see that West has seven clubs...but I do NOT think it's wise for him...in a supposedly normal and fairly standard system...to open 1C with an aceless mere 10 HCP including a stiff king. Even his own GIB definition claims that the bid shows "11-21 HCP", so in addition to showing his (always) poor judgment, he is disobeying his own definition. I have seen him on many occasions opening at the one level with "only" 10 HCP, so another issue is that the GIB definitions are incorrect, inaccurate, misleading, and perhaps even dishonest when they FALSELY claim that all their one level suit openings promise at least 11 HCP. If the GIBBO robots bid this way (and they do!), then the GIB definitions need to be changed! The HAVE needed to be changed for a long, long time! This is inexcusable.

Later, West bids 2NT. Yes, he does have hearts securely stopped, but considering the absolute DOGMEAT that he opened, I think he should bid 3C rather than 2NT.

Ultimately, the incompetent GIBBO robots sitting East-West get to an outstandingly bad 3NT and go down 3, but the oblivious twits will probably continue bidding this way. Why would they stop now, after YEARS of such idiocy?

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#750 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 06:48

West couldn't bid ONE spade (why NOT?) but later he's THRILLED to bid TWO spades. North, with a 1-4-6-2 hand, 6 HCP (including 5 that are probably good HCP), opposite a partner who made a takeout double of 1C, is TERRIFIED to compete over 2S and meekly passes(actually CRAVENLY, not just "meekly" - but it's Be Kind to GIBBO Robots Day, so I'm saying "meekly"). And this is despite the fact that North is usually an egregious overbidder who often competes for no reason on thin air. Furthermore, there is no danger of falsely encouraging South, because North has already limited his hand by bidding ONLY 1D over South's earlier takeout double.

West buys the contract in 2S, and North does what we always expect a GIBBO robot do: He makes an astoundingly stupid lead, in this case a club, because he is SO unbearably stupid that he considers it wise to lead a suit that his OPPONENT has opened and rebid.

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#751 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 07:06

At trick 7. West stupidly and CRAVENLY (amazingly stupidly and cravenly!) POPS his heart king...thereby crashing his "partner's" now-stiff ace...which IS now stiff, because East is also a GIBBO robot (which means that he is also a complete imbecile) who foolishly pitched both of his low hearts.

Once again the GIBBO robots have combined their "talents" to prove that their incompetence is WORLD CLASS incompetence. They are the BEST at being the WORST.

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#752 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 11:00

"Donald, I have bad news for you. You've just failed Grade One for the twelfth year in a row."

"Waah! Waah!"

"Now, now, Donald, please don't cry. You still have many years left to achieve your dreams. What do you want to be when you grow up?"

"I wanna be a GIBBO robot! I wanna be a GIBBO robot!"

"Why is that, Donald? I've heard that they're very bad bridge players."

"They're not! They're not! That's fake news! That's a hoax!"

"Why do you say that, Donald?"

"Because...because...they're very creative. I wanna be a GIBBO robot! I wanna be a GIBBO robot! Look at the really creative lead the GIBBO robot made on this hand - the king of hearts!"

"Well, uh, Donald, now please don't get upset and start crying again. You know it makes your ankles swell up. But I have to tell you: That heart lead worked out VERY badly for the GIBBO robot. He would have done much better if he had led a club, the suit his partner opened."

"You're lying! You're lying! Fake news! That's a hoax! You're a horrible person!"

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#753 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-05, 11:07

How easy is it to fool the GIBBO robots when they "defend"? You can decide:

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#754 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 06:45

Here comes an interior rhyme: What the HELL, pray TELL, is West's double of 3S?

GIB provides NO definition - not EVEN one of their typically useless, inaccurate, annoying ones. Nothing. Nada. Rien. Bupkis.

That's okay, GIB. I will provide one for you. It will be brief, succinct, and completely accurate. I define the double as "INSANE".

West's hand is 103, K843, 92, 86542. Let's look at this from West's perspective. At this point, he has seen only his OWN hand. He is in the PASSOUT seat. If his double is supposed to be penalty, his partnership will need at least FIVE tricks to beat the contract. HE has...a mere THREE HCP. HE has exactly ONE card that MIGHT take a trick, the heart king. His 103 doubleton of spades is not exactly a trump stack.

Okay, so maybe it's some sort of competitive or takeout double, asking his partner East to bid, right? Well, if THAT'S the case, he is asking his partner to either bid 3NT (!)...or to bid a suit at the FOUR level, where EW will require at least TEN tricks to male their contract. And guess what? West will STILL have only 3 HCP and only ONE potentially useful card (the heart king again). The ONLY suit that West's partner East has bid so far is diamonds, where West has the truly magnificent support (NOT!) of 92 doubleton. AND West is making this double when he is RED against WHITE.

So, HOWEVER West intends his double, it is a call that would only be made by a certifiable madman...and GIB, the creator of arguably the worst definitions in the history of the world, doesn't even PROVIDE a definition and doesn't even bother to state what TYPE of double this lunacy is supposed to be.

This whole thing is good only for COMEDY and is an excellent reminder of how astoundingly hopeless the GIBBO robots are and of how TOTALLY useless the GIB definitions are. In fact, the GIB definition here is even WORSE than usual, because it is NON-EXISTENT!

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#755 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 06:52

Just in case declarer MIGHT have misguessed clubs, West is kind enough to cover the 10 when South leads it. These GIBBO robots might be hopelessly incompetent bridge players, but at least they are very friendly, polite, and generous, so often doing their best to help their OPPONENTS.

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#756 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 07:02

At trick four, East panics and leads a club, giving away the game.

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#757 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 07:07

Another wretched GIBBO defence on the same hand at another table, but this time against only 2NT. West makes the questionable pitch of a spade, and when he later wins his spade queen, he fails to play a high club.

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#758 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 07:13

East is too OBLIVIOUS to RUN from 1C doubled. North-South take TWELVE tricks, effectively making a SLAM - on DEFENCE (!) - in the strain that East-West opened the bidding in!

As the saying goes, "You can't make this stuff up"! The GIBBO robots are so STUNNINGLY bad!

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#759 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 07:29

Trick 8: East, being a GIBBO robot (in other words, being a monumentally incompetent bridge player and absolutely HOPELESS "defender"), stupidly pops his heart ace, CRASHING his "partner" West's king, and allowing yet ANOTHER 'impossible" contract to make. It's what these GIBBO robots DO!

They are absolute MASTERS of the compression play!

It can never be said often enough: The GIBBO robots ROT!

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#760 User is offline   benellis58 

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Posted 2026-March-06, 07:35

East balances with 1NT. That DOES describe his hand, so it's not horrible, but reopening with a double would ALSO have described his hand and would have been a better choice. But who would ever expect a GIBBO robot to select the better alternative? Not me, I promise you!

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