[benellis58]

Looking only at the North-South cards, 4H is a reasonable contract, so I have no problem being there, but I think the GIBBO robot bid it poorly anyway. As far as I'm concerned, his leap to 4H was an overbid and his hand was worth only an invitation. I, South, had an easy acceptance, so we would have been there anyway, but on a better auction. With the unfavourable layout the hand will go down, but c'est la vie.

Meanwhile, look at trick seven: For reasons known only to himself and the other GIBBO robots who perpetually live in Bizarro World, East wins his ACE of clubs from AQ1065 (!!!)...with the king and jack still outstanding in the North and West hands (which obviously East cannot see). WHY?

At trick 13, declarer North...WINS his...QUEEN of clubs. Golly gee, I wonder if East could have PREVENTED that?

North-South score 66.04 % for going down "only" two on the board.

https://www.bridgeba...CQ%7Cpc%7CD9%7C

[benellis58]

The GIBBO robots, sorry - I meant to more accurately say the stunningly stupid GIBBO robots - lead king from ace-king.

Here's an example of why that might not be best - especially if a stunningly stupid GIBBO robot is playing with another stunningly stupid GIBBO robot.

With West's hand, despite normally leading king from AK, maybe with his NINE-diamond hand on THIS auction he should have led the ace anyway, to prevent his IMBECILE of a "partner" from doing what he did, because...

The super-M.O.R.O.N. in the East ruffed (!) the diamond king and cashed the club ace, after which I took the remaining 11 tricks, not losing even a SINGLE diamond trick, as the first diamond had been ruffed (by an I.D.I.O.T.) and I was able to pitch my only remaining diamond, thanks to the favourable club layout.

What do I think of the GIBBO robots? In case you haven't guessed, I think they are...hopeless, pathetic, and BENEATH contempt...and that is obviously based not merely on this one JOKE of a "defence" but on the consistent incompetence they demonstrate.

https://www.bridgeba...CQ%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

East's typical GIBBO "logic": "What's the ONLY suit my OPPONENTS bid? Oh, yes, spades. Then I should DEFINITELY lead my jack of spades from J10 doubleton." *****!

Then the oblivious FOOLS manage to COLLAPSE their three GUARANTEED diamond winners into only two, through the BRILLIANT "strategy" of CRASHING two honours (ace and queen) on one trick. Maybe they had just learned about unblocking...but someone should inform these ignorant louts that even when it's RIGHT to unblock, only ONE partner should be unblocking, not BOTH.

My diamond holding was J865 with declarer North opposite 943 with dummy South, while the EW "defenders" had AK10 (West) opposite Q72 (East), yet thanks to these complete nitwits, I lost ONLY two diamond tricks, and I won two on "power". They are so, SO bad, and they prove it over and over every single day.

https://www.bridgeba...CD9%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

The execrable GIB robots, who were even worse than the improved GIBBO ones, likely would have led the stiff jack of clubs. At least the GIBBO robot in the West did better than that. But: I think that looking ONLY at his West hand, the heart king (from KQ106) would be a more attractive choice than the spade lead he opted for (the 2 from Q942).

Similarly, at trick five, East's shift to a heart (with 542) seems to have much less going for it than a diamond from KJ109.

THEN, look what West does on that same trick five: He sees that his partner East led the heart deuce, so he knows (since they play fourth best - an antiquated, inferior system, by the way, as you would EXPECT from GIBBO) that East has either three or at MOST four hearts. Yet when declarer South follows with the 8, West needlessly and wastefully wins with his queen, although he knows that his 10 would have won, because he can see the 93 doubleton in dummy North.

West now fires back his king, and...PRESTO: this co-ordinated EW "defence" (ha, HA, HA!) has now ensured that declarer South will win the astounding total of THREE heart tricks, losing ONLY one, with a combined NS holding of 93 doubleton in dummy North and AJ87 in declarer South...AND with the KQ106 (!) all BEHIND (!) declarer South! This is a "defensive" feat so utterly laughable that it is something you would be surprised to see ANYWHERE except against GIB or GIBBO "defenders".

Declarer South emerges with the astounding total of ELEVEN tricks, thanks to hes VERY generous GIBBO "opponents".

https://www.bridgeba...S6%7Cpc%7CDT%7C

[benellis58]

West, for some unknown but undoubtedly foolish reason, leads a spade from J942 instead of a diamond from KJ984, but to be fair, who would ever accuse a GIBBO robot of being intelligent? And yes, I'm aware that "GIB" stands for the laughably inaccurate words "Ginsberg's Intelligent Bridgeplayer" (sic). That's the same as a fat guy nicknamed "Slim" or a bald guy who's called "Curly"!

East wins the spade king and decides to shift at trick two. He plays his heart jack from J108. Declarer South, well aware that he is playing against two complete yokels, ducks, playing the SIX from his heart holding of AK653. He is confident the two GIBBO rubes "defending" will continue hearts...and, sure enough, they do. Declarer wins the second heart and emerges with TEN tricks on a hand that DECENT defenders would have beaten.

https://www.bridgeba...S3%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

Another questionable lead. Can't say it's wrong, and to be fair, on some other random layout it might work, but based on North's 2NT call, he was far more likely to have clubs than hearts. In practice, on THIS random hand, the GIBBO robots were snakebitten (as is SO often the case) by their choice of lead.

https://www.bridgeba...H2%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

Ho hum, yet ANOTHER perverse lead by a GIBBO robot. No wonder Diana wisely titled this thread that she created "Benellis58 GIB bashing on repeat"!

Declarer South wins his heart ace at trick one (after the play went 10, jack, king) and slides his heart 7 at trick 2. East wins his 9 and shifts to...

Ha, ha, just joking! East, a GIBBO robot, who by his very nature LOVES to shift and HATES to return his partner's "suit", plays back at trick 3...his heart 5 (from his remaining 65 holding), despite SEEING that dummy North has the high Q8. He does this RATHER than shifting to what looks like an OBVIOUS club. Declarer South emerges with 9 tricks, scoring up plus 600 for making 3NT (via five diamonds, three hearts, and the spade ace), a contract that had NO legitimate play. The GIBBO robots have AGAIN managed to blow a defence through their witless series of plays.

https://www.bridgeba...CA%7Cpc%7CCT%7C

[benellis58]

Another less than stellar lead and defence. Is anyone shocked? I said, "Is ANYONE shocked?" No? That's what I thought!

https://www.bridgeba...H8%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Here, I can't criticize West's lead, and I think East-West were quite unlucky with the diamond layout. But despite that, they also contributed, via their subsequent wretched "defence", to the ZERO percent score that they "achieved" on this board (a score, by the way, that GIBBO robots are unsurprisingly VERY familiar with).

https://www.bridgeba...HK%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Let's examine some GIBBO bidding:

North passes. East opens 1NT. South, the only human at the table, expects (correctly, as it turns out) to beat this, so he makes a penalty double.

West correctly RUNS by bidding 2D, a transfer to hearts. North bids 2H, defined as "8-11 HCP; 9-12 total points; forcing to 3NT". As one would expect, this is a typically poorly written GIB definition, but at least it comes close to accurately describing North's strength. And now, now, NOW...

We get to witness live and in person the WORLD CLASS STUPIDITY of the GIBBO robot sitting East.

He has already opened 1NT showing 15-17 HCP. He did that with K9742, A73, KQ9, QJ, so, yes, he did have the 15 HCP required to justify the call, but let's be honest: It's "only" 15, not the 16 or 17 that it might have been, so it's certainly a minimum...and possibly even LESS than a minimum, since 3 of his 15 HCP come from the QJ doubleton of clubs...which on a bad day might actually be worthless (and today WAS a "bad day" for the poor soul, because today his clubs were worthless).

So after North's 2H bid, any NORMAL East, any COMPETENT East, any DECENT East, any East who had a CLUE about how to play bridge, would now say to himself, "Phew! We just dodged a bullet! we were going for a NUMBER! Thank Heaven that North, a fellow GIBBO robot, was stupid enough to BID and RESCUE us!"

Then, after saying that to himself, any NORMAL East, any COMPETENT East, any DECENT East, any East who had a CLUE about how to play bridge, would now say to the whole table, one simple four-letter word: "Pass".

But this wasn't any NORMAL East, any COMPETENT East, any DECENT East, any East who had a CLUE about how to play bridge. THIS was a typically braindead GIBBO robot, so he DIDN'T pass. He...DOUBLED! What did this mean? Well, since I'm not familiar with "thought" processes (if you'll pardon the expression!) in the Bizarro World inhabited by GIBBO robots, I checked the definition, which said:

"2-5 clubs; 2-5 diamonds; 3-5 hearts; 2-5 spades; 15-17 HCP; 18- total points". In other words, it said NOTHING that his earlier 1NT opening had not already said, except that it now promised at least three hearts. Why the HELL would this lunatic do anything except pass, with his subminimum 1NT opener, opposite a partner who had RUN from 1NT doubled, and facing two opponents, who according to the definitions of South's double and North's 2H, had at LEAST 24 combined North-South HCP?

And never mind this particular imbecile in the East on this particular hand - consider that this insane double is a part of the recommended GIBBO system!

NS end up playing in 3NT and scoring 11 tricks. And East-West? What about East-West? How do THEY do on th board? Glad you asked: They "earned" themselves yet another ZERO percent score to add to their HUGE, VAST, VOLUMINOUS collection of the countless ZEROES their play has previously "earned" them. The GIBBO robots ROT!

https://www.bridgeba...DK%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Virtually everyone agrees that declarer play is what the GIBBO robots are best at when it comes to bridge. Even I agree with that, although largely by default, since they are so incomparably bad at every other aspect of the game.

So, let's give East a chance to show off how "good" he is at declaring. Watch him take 9 tricks, scoring an OVERTRICK in 2S! Bravo, Mr. East! Or, uhh, maybe NOT "bravo", considering that he could...and should...have taken 10.

https://www.bridgeba...CS4%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

6S was always open and shut for exactly 12 tricks on this board, but we can STILL "bash" (to use the excellent word that Diana included in the title when she created this essential thread) East for his lead.

HE is LOOKING AT the ace of hearts in his own hand. He is also looking at the Q104 of spades, which on a lucky day might be a TRICK against the spade slam. He heard his partner West DOUBLE South's five HEART response to Blackwood.

All these factors would seem to make the ace of hearts a STANDOUT lead, so of COURSE he leads a...CLUB and is VERY lucky that it did not cost!

Some might say, "Yeah, but he had a STIFF club. He was obviously hoping for a ruff." Uhh...sorry, but that makes no sense. After a BLACKWOOD auction, North-South VOLUNTARILY...LEAPT to 6S, so they are NOT missing two keycards, and since East is LOOKING at the ace of hearts, he KNOWS that that is the one and only key that NS are missing, so he KNOWS that his partner West cannot and does not have the ace of clubs.

https://www.bridgeba...S5%7Cpc%7CDJ%7C