Benellis58 GIB bashing on repeat Groundhog Day
#2541
Posted 2026-August-23, 04:53
What's that, Mr. West? NOT right? You're doing it so that you can...cash your two high diamonds (!) and then play a THIRD diamond, thereby setting up...two diamond winners for...DECLARER?
Pardon me, Mr. West, I'll be back in about 25 minutes from now...IF I can manage to stop LAUGHING even by then!
(FORTY-five minutes later. Yes, it took longer than expected to stop LAUGHING at this latest example of GIBBO "defensive" I.D.I.O.C.Y.!)
Declarer takes NINE tricks!
The good news for Frick and Frack is that they get to add yet ANOTHER zero to their MASSIVE lifetime collection of total failure. They are now SO far ahead of their nearest competitor in the FUTILITY SWEEPSTAKES that he will probably NEVER catch them. The names of Frick and Frack (along with ALL other GIBBO robots, of course) will live FOREVER in the Hall of Shame, as the worst "bridge players" of all time. Well, that's SOME sort of immortality anyway, so congratulations to Frick, Frack, Johnny H., Donald J. D., Sylvester B., and all other GIBBO robots.
https://www.bridgeba...S4%7Cpc%7CSA%7C
#2542
Posted 2026-August-23, 05:23
https://www.bridgeba...S9%7Cmc%7C10%7C
#2543
Posted 2026-August-23, 05:55
West, North, and East all pass, and South opens 1C in fourth.
Passed-hand West doubles, showing, according to the GIB definition "11- HCP" and "12 total points". It's an absolute JOKE that GIB can magically ascertain that West has exactly and specifically "12 total points", but GIB knows NOTHING about "total" points, so THAT part of the definition can be thrown into the nearest trashcan, as usual.
However, West probably DOES have 11 HCP (his max, since he failed to open the bidding, and GIBBO robots always open with 12 or more). If not 11, maybe 10, but probably not less.
His double also shows, according to GIB, "3-5 diamonds", "3-4" in each major, and "2- clubs". In other words, it appears to be a perfectly normal passed hand takeout double.
It's now North's turn to bid. He has J97, 732, 108764, AQ. That looks like a PERFECTLY NORMAL and PERFECTLY OBVIOUS one diamond bid.
But the hand-hogging, oblivious I.D.I.O.T. bids 1NT. Note that he has 7 HCP...but SIX of the seven are the AQ doubleton of clubs - his PARTNER's suit. He does not have a stopper in EITHER major, so he is VERY likely wrongsiding the contract EVEN if no trump happens to be the correct strain. The hand rates to play much better if declared from his PARTNER's side, and North does have FIVE diamonds, so why doesn't he bid one DIAMOND instead of his ridiculous, STUPID, and SELFISH INT?
BTW, the GIB definition of 1NT typically throws in a piece of obvious, unnecessary, completely useless, annoying and insulting nonsense, because it begins with these two words: "Free NT". GIB, do you REALLY think it's essential to point out that this is a "free" bid? DO you? Come on, GIB: We know you're incapable of writing good definitions, but can't you at LEAST remove this needlessly annoying type of trash from them? Well, I guess you CAN'T, GIB, because the definition of 2H begins with the same type of drivel: "Free bid; new suit" - FOUR words, two TOTALLY OBVIOUS and therefore TOTALLY USELESS pieces of (ha, ha) "information".
GIB definitions are the worst I have ever seen ANYWHERE...not JUST in a bridge context. GIB is the pits.
https://www.bridgeba...CT%7Cmc%7C10%7C
#2544
Posted 2026-August-23, 06:06
I won't discuss our "defence" in detail, but I will just ask my "partner" North one question: Hey, "partner", why, at trick six, when declarer West led the 5 of diamonds, did you NEEDLESSLY, STUPIDLY, and indeed PERVERSELY, play your KING (!) from your remaining K2 doubleton? Asking for a friend.
https://www.bridgeba...H9%7Cpc%7CC7%7C
#2545
Posted 2026-August-23, 06:10
The 9 of diamonds is The Curse of Scotland. In 2026, GIBBO robots are The Curse of Bridge.
https://www.bridgeba...HK%7Cpc%7CH2%7C
#2546
Posted 2026-August-23, 06:16
https://www.bridgeba...CDA%7Cmc%7C9%7C
#2547
Posted 2026-August-23, 10:16
Here's an example. They are NOT hard to find!
Against South's 3NT, the GIBBO imbecile in the West decides his best POSSIBLE lead is his stiff 9 of hearts. It's quite obvious that this M.O.R.O.N. was dropped on his head as a child. The only question is whether it was merely dozens of times, or (more likely) hundreds of times.
East wins his offside heart king, but these two dweebs have managed to set up all the NS hearts AND give declarer communication with dummy.
East shifts to a spade at trick two. West wins declarer's 10 with his jack, and then...even though East had returned the NINE of spades (presumably denying ANY higher ones, and therefore MARKING South with the AQ!), West stupidly plays the spade king at trick three, thereby GUARANTEEING South TWO spade winners...even THOUGH all the relevant honours (i.e.: king and jack) were BEHIND his original AQ10. Now, after the (STUPID!) heart lead, South could always have taken 11 tricks anyway, since the layout was favourable with diamonds 3-2 and the club king onside, but West's imbecilic "defence" made 11 tricks a LOCK without even NEEDING the club hook.
BTW, you'll notice that South's 3NT call was not exactly a textbook bid! In games with three always disgusting GIBBO robots, South's bids are OFTEN not "textbook" bids, because he knows right from the start that his "partner" is a total M.O.R.O.N. and that his opponents are also M.O.R.O.N.S.
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p82rapb
#2548
Posted 2026-August-23, 10:30
Later, Supertwit in the West wins his offside club king and plays another diamond. There's a saying "You can't fix stupid", and this GIBBO dimwit is certainly proving it. I don't want to pick on the C.R.E.T.I.N. though, so I will defend him by saying that he is no more stupid than any GIBBO robot, because they are all equally imbecilic.
South easily waltzes home with ELEVEN tricks, because these hopeless GIBBO bozos NEVER managed to get a spade trick. They were too busy stupidly leading trump and then diamonds, diamonds, diamonds. If they weren't so downright FUNNY, they would be COMPLETELY sickening.
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p8n5bf9
#2549
Posted 2026-August-23, 11:03
He has FIVE (!) TOP (!) losers: the AK of clubs, the AK of hearts, and the offside king of spades (trump). FIVE! Yet, against Johnny Halfwit in the West and Donald J. Dumbo in the East, South takes...TEN (!) tricks, scoring two overtricks (!) and losing ONLY...three of his FIVE...TOP...losers!
West, Mr. Halfwit, leads an ineffective diamond, which South wins. At trick two, Johnny wins his spade king and actually finds a club shift. Bravo, Sir, bravo! However, the club he leads is his 7 from A87 tripleton. Now, playing with any competent partner, this would be fine...but Johnny Halfwit is most definitely NOT playing with a COMPETENT partner, because he is saddled with one of the world's all-time WORST "bridge players", a fellow GIBBO robot, who is, by definition, a complete I.D.I.O.T. In fact, Donald J. Dumbo might well be thw worst of ALL the GIBBO robots.
Sleepy-eyed Dumbo wins his club king, but he is too agonizingly stupid to have even the faintest idea of what is happening. The ignorant bewilderfish plays back a DIAMOND. M.O.R.O.N.!
Declarer wins the diamond, pulls trump, plays all the rest of his diamonds, pitching BOTH of dummy's heart losers, knocks out the club ace to set up a third-round club winner, and emerges with an "impossible" 10 tricks.
"Impossible", that is, EXCEPT against Halfwit, Dumbo, or any and all other GIBBO "defenders".
Is there ANYONE...ANYWHERE... who STILL claims that GIBBO robots are "better than most human players"?
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/yc562hff
#2550
Posted 2026-August-23, 11:27
South doesn't have ANY good or unflawed bid over East's 1C opener, so he decides to go for the gold by overcalling 1S. All pass, so that's the final contract...in a four-two (!) "fit" with a "side fit" of 6-4 (!) in diamonds.
NO problem WHATSOEVER, though, because Halfwit and Dumbo are again the "defenders". Johnny leads a club, which is fine...and also AMAZING, because he (gasp!) actually led his partner's suit! Although I consider Johnny to be absolutely hopeless at bridge (like all GIBBO robots), I bear him no personal ill will, so I really hope that he is not kicked out of the GIBBO Union for violating one of their SACRED rules and leading (gasp!) his PARTNER'S suit!
Dumbo wins the club, and IMBECILE that he is, he shifts to a SPADE (trump), allowing me to easily take TEN tricks! Although I have nothing against Johnny, I do NOT like Donnie. He's a nasty person, never stops bragging (although he really has NOTHING to brag about), and he wears too much makeup, so if HE gets kicked out of the GIBBO Union, I won't shed any tears.
On this hand, where I made 10 tricks (just like the one in post # 2549 immediately above), I "only" had FOUR TOP losers (ha, ha), but I ALSO had only ONE dummy entry...and a 4-3 (!) enemy trump split. Yes, we had violated Burn's Law, and had fewer trumps than the "defenders"! If that sickening old clown Dumbo had merely continued playing CLUBS, we would NOT have dome well. Fortunately for us, Dumbo has ALWAYS been incompetent.
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/y3cxne38
#2551
Posted Yesterday, 04:10
Of course, it doesn't always work out, but this is one that did. Here, I opened an obviously abnormal 1NT.
West, not unreasonably, led a spade. East won his ace and shifted to a diamond. These two misfits were now in a position to beat me two tricks on the fly, via the spade ace and FIVE top diamond tricks.
Note that from the beginning I only had 7 top tricks anyway (5 clubs, 2 diamonds) and EVEN if they had led clubs or hearts, I would STILL have had to knock out the spade ace to get 9 tricks, but in so doing, I would ALWAYS be exposed to the killing diamond shift anyway.
So did this hand teach me to smarten up, stop fooling around (by operating or experimenting) and just bid normally?
No. No, it didn't. I was always aware that some operations would fail and lead to disaster (and some certainly have) but I'm willing to accept that as long as most of them work out well.
Besides, THIS one worked out WELL! "But how?" you might VERY logically ask. "West made a reasonable lead. East won and made the killing shift. How could it POSSIBLY work out well? Did they not IMMEDIATELY cash their winners and beat your silly contract TWO tricks?"
No. No, they didn't. I made NINE tricks, wrapped up my 3NT contract, and scored 100 % on the board. They added yet ANOTHER complete zero to their MASSIVE and probably FOREVER untouchable collection of total failure. But...HOW did even THESE contemptible, disgusting, clueless GIBBO monstrosities FAIL to beat the game after their good start?
Well...it wasn't a TRULY good start, because...when East found the GOOD diamond shift at trick two, he erred as ONLY a piece of GIBBO dirt can err! The boneheaded ignoramus had the AK1074 of diamonds. He did not lead either his king or ace, and he did not lead his FOURTH-BEST diamond (the 7) either - despite the fact that these pieces of GIBBO trash play fourth best! The useless slob led his FIFTH-best diamond, the 4, proving for what (?), maybe the 50 millionth time (?) that these worthless jerks can\t get even the SIMPLEST things right.
I, perforce, played my stiff jack, and West won his queen. Even though his fleabrained "partner" had DECEIVED him by his ridiculous, incorrect lead of the 4, West should STILL have played back a diamond, but West - being a cursed, manifestly oblivious GIBBO robot himself, was too mind-blowingly STUPID to do that. The jackass played a...SPADE, which could not POSSIBLY be right, since East had won the ACE at trick one. Note that this was not only an irredeemably insane bridge play, but it also illustrated for the Nth time what truly WRETCHED "partners" these sickening GIBBO pieces of garbage are. West is effectively saying, "Yes, 'partner', I saw your diamond shift but I'm going back to spades because I'm FAR better than you, and your diamond shift was probably wrong. Maybe you didn't notice that I led a SPADE."
So, they immediately set up my eighth and ninth tricks by knocking out their own spade ace, which I would have had to do myself if they hadn't taken care of it for me, then they stumbled into the CORRECT suit at trick two, but then they shifted BACK to spades at trick three, allowing me to claim my required 9 tricks, the eighth and ninth of which they had been kind enough to set up for me!
These useless GIBBO stooges deserve each other, but no one else should have to constantly observe and sometimes endure their wretched ineptitude. Does BBO not care that other bridge sites - BBO's competitors - can offer superior robots that might well cause BBO members and paying customers to leave BBO in favour of a site with DECENT robots?
https://www.bridgeba...HJ%7Cpc%7CH8%7C
#2552
Posted Yesterday, 05:26
some DECENT robots to BBO. Do it for your members, do it for your paying customers (!), but most importantly do it for yourselves ...to ensure that BBO survives.
https://www.bridgeba...HT%7Cpc%7CHK%7C
#2553
Posted Today, 04:06
As soon as North bids 3NT, we don't have to see even a single one of his cards to know - beyond a shadow of a doubt - that he is, indeed, an I.D.I.O.T. To be fair, we knew it as soon as he sat down, because he's a detestable, worthless GIBBO robot, and they are all complete and total I.D.I.O.T.S.
But this particular I.D.I.O.T. confirmed his stature by bidding 3NT, because regardless of what happened on the board, whether he took 13 tricks or zero tricks - he could not possibly have a legitimate 3NT bid. In second seat, he had been unable to open the bidding, so he had at most 11 HCP, because GIBBO robots open all 12-counts. His partner South opened 1C in fourth, but was forever silent after that.
So, whatever else happened, and whatever North had, he could NOT have had a legitimate 3NT call.
What DID the imbecile have? He had QJ, KQ97, 10764, K85, so he might have had ONLY an invitational TWO no trump call on many auctions...but HERE he perhaps didn't have even THAT, because the enemy had bid diamonds and spades. The clown's "stoppers" were 10764 in diamonds and QUEEN-JACK DOUBLETON in spades, so unless South could help out, he (North) actually had NEITHER enemy suit stopped.
3NT went down two, and we scored a basically average 53.6 % on the board, but even if we had scored A HUNDRED, his 3NT call would STILL have been GIBBO-level...STUPID. Even if 3NT had been the IDEAL spot, the jackass would have gained NOTHING, because if it WAS the ideal spot, then surely South would have had a hand good enough to accept an invitation and game would have been reached anyway.
https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/yckhtz3a

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