[benellis58]

Shared top of 92.31 % for "only" going one down in 4H. Typical BBO trump break of 5-0, and East merrily ruffs his partner's diamond winners.

https://www.bridgeba...CC3%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

Against South's 2NT, East wins his partner's trick one club lead with his king. Does he continue clubs? Of COURSE he doesn't. HE'S a stinking GIBBO robot, so he'd rather permanently unplug himself than EVER return his "partner's" suit. (What a GLORIOUS day it would be if these nauseating GIBBO robots DID unplug themselves...and then leave the planet Earth forever!).

The fool shifts to the heart jack. Then at trick five he cashes his heart king to make CERTAIN of setting up DECLARER'S queen before FINALLY and VERY belatedly playing a second round of clubs.

Much better to have GIBBO robots as your OPPONENTS than as your "partner"!

https://www.bridgeba...C7%7Cpc%7CCQ%7C

[benellis58]

West led the 4 of clubs, so East SHOULD have known that it was either from 42 doubleton or a stiff 4. Thus, it was CLEAR for East to win trick one and then cash a second club at trick two, but the braindead GIBBO zombie stupidly switched to a spade, allowing me to take TWELVE tricks.

Every time I walk past a garbage can, I politely stop and say "Hello Mr. GIBBO. how are you doing today. Nice weather, isn't it?"

https://www.bridgeba...C3%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

INCREDIBLE lack of intelligence, logic, consistency, and reliability from the GIBBO piece of trash in the North:

GIB defines his 2H call as "10+ HCP; forcing to 3NT". He actually DOES have 10 HCP, and given that his partner opened a 15-17 1NT, it indeed makes SENSE that he wants to force to 3NT. Bravo, Mr. North!

BUT...BUT...BUT...

East bids 2S, South passes, West passes, and North, in passout seat, now...PASSES!

HE, on the previous round, made a call FORCING TO 3NT (!), and now HE - in passout position - PASSES OUT EAST'S lowly 2S bid!!!

I, as South, was actually PLEASED to hear this, since I had operated (as I often do) by opening 1NT with a mere 14 HCP. We scored 94.12 % for beating 2S one trick, so all was fine...but that did NOT mean that North's auction was good. Regardless of result, his auction was nonsensical, and in addition to all the criticisms I mentioned in the first sentence of this post, his sequence was COMPLETELY undisciplined. There's a REASON that I constantly berate and insult GIB/GIBBO!

https://www.bridgeba...CD6%7Cmc%7C7%7C

[benellis58]

We reached the par spot of 6H (since 6NT fails on a spade lead), but with NO thanks to the ALWAYS hideous, antiquated, wildly illogical, downright hopeless 2C system mandated by GIB.

As I've said many times, the whole system stinks, but the worst part is GIB's incredibly stupid use of the 2NT response. Even back in the primitive era when GIB was created, I can't see why any bridge player would think this was a good use of 2NT. There are numerous reasons why it's insane for 2NT to be used as it is, but I've already pointed them all out several times in this essential thread that Diana was so wisely inspired to create, so I won't waste my time delineating them all again.

Just look at THIS auction, though, and note that because of the imbecilic GIB system, the WEAK hand takes command of the auction and becomes captain. Who ever thought that this clueless, backward approach was a GOOD idea?

https://www.bridgeba...C9%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

Trick four: My imbecile of a "partner" decides to fool ME by playing the WRONG heart! I.D.I.O.T.!

https://www.bridgeba...HK%7Cpc%7CSA%7C

[benellis58]

As usual, my GIBBO "partner" bids like the complete I.D.I.O.T. that he is and that ALL his GIBBO brethren also are. The M.O.R.O.N.'S hopeless ignorance gets us to an "impossible" contract for NO reason.

And yet...we scored...100 % on the board! Why? Because fortunately we had two GIBBO robots "defending", and they "defended" as "well" as you would expect from two typically steaming piles of GIBBO trash.

But first, let's look at North's nauseatingly clueless bidding. I've mentioned before that the creator of the GIB system managed to give birth to one of the all-around most stupid, useless, illogical bidding systems in the history of the game...but to be fair, it has ONE good thing in it. That ONE good thing is Drury, which is a VERY useful and valuable convention.

So, on this hand, North correctly passed as dealer and then correctly bid 2C Drury after his partner South opened 1H in third seat. Hey, congratulations, Mr. North! You made an astounding TWO (!!!) consecutive correct calls! VERY impressive, because GIBBO robots often have great difficulty making even ONE correct call. You're a hero in the GIBBO world!

But then...at his third turn to bid...the "hero" falls from grace and exposes himself as a total imbecile, just like each and every other GIBBO robot that FOULS our planet. After North's excellent 2C call, his LHO East doubled (PATHETICALLY, INCOHERENTLY, and AMBIGUOUSLY defined by GIB in a truly MISERABLE piece of work, but at least showing "rebiddable clubs" and "KQ" or equivalent of clubs). Then South and West passed.

North is now in the passout seat. With his 2C Drury bid, he has ALREADY shown "3+ hearts; 11- HCP; 10-12 total points". Yes, it's yet another ineptly written definition of the kind we ALWAYS expect from GIB, but it does, in its own vague, lazy, clumsy GIB way, describe his hand. He really has no extras beyond what his Drury call ALREADY showed, so it should be obvious to anyone with an IQ above 6 to now bid a gentle 2H. Over that, South can pass with a minimum, leap to game with an appropriate hand, or perhaps invite by raising to 3H. South ALREADY knows roughly what to expect from North's upcoming dummy.

But GIBBO North obviously has an IQ below six, because he does not bid the OBVIOUSLY correct 2H.

"Oh, does he stupidly OVERBID by JUMPING to THREE hearts, despite having no extras?"

Nope. Worse. He makes the INCREDIBLY STUPID bid of 2S.

"Well, that's dumb, I agree, but at least South can now sign off in THREE hearts. Granted, you'd rather be in TWO hearts than three if South has a minimum or sub-minimum, but MAYBE 9 tricks will be available anyway if that's the case. But yes, bidding 2S was REALLY stupid."

All true, and I did sign off in THREE hearts and 3H was cold. EXCEPT THAT...North now RAISED (!!!) to FOUR hearts because he's a TERMINALLY stupid GIBBO robot (as they ALL are).

So here I was in an "impossible" 4H, thanks to the braindead GIBBO piece of garbage sitting across from me. But luckily there were two other GIBBO numbskulls present: West and East. Now, remember that East had shown GOOD CLUBS, so ALL West had to do was to lead a...drum roll, please...CLUB!!! But being a piece of slimy trash GIBBO robot, the ignorant bozo led a spade! I guess his 973 tripleton there was just TOO attractive to pass up!I now rolled 4H, pitching one of dummy's two CLUB (!) losers on a spade, and lost only two TOP diamonds and ONE TOP...CLUB...instead of two diamonds and TWO TOP CLUBS.

So, after my IMBECILIC "partner's" RIDICULOUS auction, we scored 100 % (instead of the ZERO that the M.O.R.O.N.'S woeful bidding deserved!), thanks to an equally RIDICULOUS and IMBECILIC lead by the GIBBO reject in the West. EVERY GIB/GIBBO robot stinks! They are the worst "bridge players" of all time!

https://www.bridgeba...DJ%7Cpc%7CCT%7C

[benellis58]

West shows the world that he is not only a clueless "bridge player" but also a cowardly one, as he stupidly and cravenly passes over 3H instead of competing with a pretty obvious 3S.

https://www.bridgeba...CC9%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

Silly, illogical lead followed by scintillatingly ugly "defence".

So what ELSE is new with Frick and Frack?

https://www.bridgeba...SQ%7Cpc%7CSJ%7C

[mw64ahw]

benellis58, on 2026-August-22, 03:49, said:

After an uninterrupted enemy auction of 1C by South, 1S by North, 1NT by South, West wisely decides to lead one of the two unbid suits (diamonds and hearts). Bravo, Mr. West: You have just led us to believe that you are more clever than 99.99 % of your braindead GIBBO brethren.

But you have also confirmed that you are (far!) LESS clever than any human bridge players, because for Lord knows what reason, you opted to lead from your TWO-card red suit rather than from your FOUR-card one. Dweeb!

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/bdhn8v63

Looks like a sensible lead
You dont want to lead a black suit and you wont win any tricks developing Hearts so lead what may be partners longest suit

[benellis58]

Another interesting thread:

https://www.bridgeba...my-strong-pass/

[benellis58]

More laughter, courtesy of GIB - the world's greatest comedian:

Check out the guffaw-inducing GIB definition of 5C: "5+ diamonds; 21 HCP; strong rebiddable clubs; 3 card diamonds; 22 total points".

Absolute garbage, as usual. First, why the Hell should this bid show EXACTLY 21 HCP? The bit about EXACTLY 22 total points is also pure nonsense, of course, but ANY mention of "total" points in a GIB definition should always be ignored anyway, since GIB has conclusively proven on countless occasions that it knows absolutely NOTHING about "total" points.

But the really FUNNY part concerns diamonds. The first thing mentioned in this typically worthless GIB definition is that the bid shows "5+ diamonds", but later, the fourth thing mentioned is that it shows "3 card diamonds". In the SAME definition, the diamond suit quickly and magically shrunk.

Did the author of this joke of a definition actually take pride in the job he was doing? Also, did anyone EVER bother proofreading the trash that passes for GIB definitions?

Meanwhile, the "defence" by the GIBBO robots on this hand was almost as wretched as the definition was. Note that I said "almost", because as horrid as the "defence" was (and it was indeed TRULY horrid), it would be almost impossible to match the incompetence displayed in the absurd definition.

GIB rots. GIBBO rots.

https://www.bridgeba...CT%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

The result was fine, but why on Earth is North freely bidding 4C...red against white...with only three clubs...in DIRECT, non-passout position...especially since in the (hopeless, antiquated, poorly designed) GIB system, South's 2C was not a game force?

BTW, it's been a while since I complained about the useless, unnecessary, annoying, insulting gibberish that the GIB definitions far too often begin with, so I'll do some of that complaining now, as a reminder.

The definition of 1D begins "Minor suit opening". Is that REALLY necessary?

The definition of 1H begins "One-level overcall". Is that REALLY necessary?

The definition of 2C begins "Free bid". Is that REALLY necessary?

Maybe if the author of the execrable GIB definitions spent as much time making sure they're accurate and complete as he did on including these useless beginnings, his GIB definitions wouldn't be such worthless trash.

https://www.bridgeba...D9%7Cpc%7CHQ%7C

[benellis58]

Another hopelessly pathetic GIB definition:

2NT is incorrectly and stupidly defined as "Invitational to 3NT game...". First, to continue the complaint raised in post 2953 immediately above, it is not...NOT...NOT (!!!) necessary to point out that 3NT is "game". It is useless, annoying, and insulting! Does Mr. GIB actually think that the players will be unaware that 3NT is "game" if he does not ride in on his white stallion to point it out? REALLY annoying!

Then...the bid, contrary to the COMPLETELY INCORRECT GIB DEFINITION, is NOT "invitational". It is TO PLAY! South has already described HIS hand, and North has described HIS. Armed with that knowledge, South could now pass 2S, invite with 3S, or leap to 4S. Depending on partnership methods, other SUIT bids might convey various meanings. But if South wants to play in no trump (and if no sophisticated partnership methods exist), he will at this point bid either 2NT or 3NT to play, based on his own hand and his KNOWLEDGE of North's. If 2NT was invitational, as the ridiculous, INCORRECT GIB definition stupidly claims, then South could never stop in 2NT when it is RIGHT to do so!

Furthermore, the piece of trash GIB definition goes on to say that 2NT shows "2-4 spades". Really, GIB? REALLY???!!! If South had FOUR spades (or sometimes even three), GIB, would he really be "correcting" North's two SPADES to 2NT? This definition is nothing but GARBAGE, as FAR too many GIB definitions are.

https://www.bridgeba...D6%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

We had a shared top of 80 % on this board, so -as always - I'm not complaining about the result. This is a reminder that the purpose of this essential thread that Diana so wisely created is never intended to cry about bad results or boast about good ones. The one and only purpose is always to, as Diana so eloquently expressed it, "bash" GIB - its hopeless system, its pathetic definitions, and its disgustingly bad robots. The hope is that by so doing, the powers that be will realize that GIB is a cancerous blight on BBO...and that having realized that, they will get rid of GIB forever and replace it with a DECENT system, DECENT definitions, and DECENT robots - all of which DO exist in 2026. This hoped-for change would benefit all BBO members and paying customers, but it would benefit BBO most of all in this modern era where many competing bridge sites have emerged as competitors to BBO.

Now, on to the hand in question:

Regardless of result, is it not amazing that North...in passout position...PASSED OUT East's 1NT? These GIB/GIBBO robots are notorious for balancing, often with EXTREMELY limited "values"...yet HERE the robot PASSED OUT 1NT when he had never bid with 84, 74, 63, AK98762...AND his partner South had opened the bidding!

https://www.bridgeba...DA%7Cpc%7CD8%7C

[benellis58]

Typically imbecilic lead.

https://www.bridgeba...C7%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Another M.O.R.O.N.I.C. lead by another M.O.R.O.N.I.C. GIBBO piece of trash. The fool knows that clubs is declarer's second suit, yet he leads his stiff club ace at trick one. This is especially stupid because his trump (heart) holding is J1094.

https://www.bridgeba...SK%7Cpc%7CC8%7C

[benellis58]

North bids 3C Stayman over South's 2NT opener. Fair enough - he's obviously looking for a 4-4 spade fit.

But South bids 3H. South could STILL have four spades, because with four of each major, he bids hearts first.

North now bids 4C, figuring that if they don't have a spade fit, clubs MIGHT be worth exploring. Besides, if South DOES have four spades (in addition to the four hearts he's shown), he can bid 4S over 4C and North will find the spade fit that he was originally seeking with his Stayman bid. And South can also bid 4NT over 4C if he (South) thinks that NT will be the best strain. So, although I'm not sure that 4C is North's BEST choice over 3H, I can't criticize it.

BUT...over 4C, SOUTH BIDS FOUR SPADES, showing four spades! (Yes, I'm aware that as South I actually have only THREE spades. I'll explain later in this post why I "lied".)

Now, over South's 4S, North...leaps to...six...NO TRUMP!!!

North's auction makes NO sense and is TYPICALLY inconsistent!

North has FOURTEEN (!!!) HCP opposite a partner (South) who showed 20-21. Thus, from the moment that South opened 2NT, North knew that his partnership had 34 or 35 HCP - basically the range for 6NT. He COULD have bid 6NT directly over 2NT. Presumably, the reason he did not do so is that he thought they might have a GRAND in spades or clubs, and that is why he started with Stayman - hoping to find a 4-4 spade fit. When South bid HEARTS, North presumably STILL hoped to find a fit where they could bid a GRAND, so he bid 4C...over which South might show club support OR might bid 4S, showing that he had four spades (as well as four hearts). If North FOUND a black suit fit that he had been LOOKING FOR with BOTH his Stayman bid AND his 4C bid, MAYBE he could now investigate that GRAND that he had presumably been seeking.

BUT...as far as HE knew, he had SUCCEEDED in finding the 4-4 spade fit that he had sought from the beginning...yet NOW...rather than investigating a possible spade grand, he inexplicably and inconsistently GAVE UP ON FURTHER INVESTIGATION and SIGNED OFF IN 6NT! Remember: He could have bid 6NT directly over 2NT, but didn't. So WHY, having FOUND the spade fit that he was initially seeking, did he now ABANDON all thoughts of spade or club fits and bid 6NT? It makes NO sense. Let him either jump to 6NT immediately...OR let him look for a magical black suit fit...but having chosen the latter approach - and having successfully FOUND (as far as HE knew!) the spade fit he had been seeking - he now INEXPLICABLY changed horses and bid the same 6NT that he could have in the first place. Totally illogical, totally inconsistent.

Now, why did I "lie" by bidding 4S when I had only three (not four!) spades? I did it because it was matchpoints, so I didn't want to play in low-scoring clubs, and I was willing to play in a Moysian 4-3 spade fit with my chunky spades and doubleton diamond. Furthermore, I have NO problem operating or "experimenting" in games with three robots.

With the spade king onside, we had an easy overtrick in 6NT and had a shared top of 90.48 %. I'm happy to take the score, but I have no idea WHY we did so well, since bidding 6NT is child's play with our combined values, and making the overtrick simply requires taking the spade hook. Oh well, don't look a gift horse in the mouth, I guess.

https://www.bridgeba...S4%7Cmc%7C13%7C

[benellis58]

North's 3S and 4S bids are stupid as only GIB bids can be. The definitions for both calls are stupid as only GIB definitions can be.

After South initially bids 2C over North's 1D opening, and subsequently SPLINTERS in support of diamonds with 3H, how on Earth is it NOW important for North to bid three SPADES on his silly little spade suit of J1032? The bid is pathetically defined as "5 diamonds; 4 spades" followed by GIB's typically RIDICULOUSLY broad point range that is SO broad that it's completely useless (just like GIB itself).

Then after South cuebids 4C, North bids...FOUR SPADES (!) on the same puny J1032 of spades. His tremendously stupid spade bid doesn't even come CLOSE to matching his own GIB definition, which laughably claims that his 4S call shows "6+ diamonds" (which he does NOT have) and "twice rebiddable spades" (which he is several GALAXIES away from having!). It also continues with a LUDICROUSLY broad and therefore TOTALLY useless statement about his points, claiming that he has "11-21 HCP" - an ELEVEN (!!!) POINT RANGE. Oh yeah, that REALLY narrows it down. Oh yeah, that's REALLY useful. The hopeless GIB definition also has an ELEVEN POINT RANGE for his "total" points, which is obviously equally USELESS. His "total" points are defined as "12-22" - totally meaninglessly, of course, since GIB knows NOTHING about "total" points and usually comes up with them the same nonsensical way it did here, simply by adding one point at each end to the defined HCP numbers.

Is there anyone on the planet who has not yet realized that GIB/GIBBO is nothing but garbage? And BTW, the definition of 4C is also some of the smelliest trash you will EVER read, as it claims to be "forcing to 4H"! Four HEARTS???!!! Why the HELL would it be forcing to four HEARTS (!!!!!) when North opened one DIAMOND and South is vigourously supporting DIAMONDS after earlier bidding CLUBS, and North has shown at least four SPADES! Good grief - the one suit they do NOT have is quite obviously HEARTS, yet this insane GIB definition says that 4C is forcing to four HEARTS!!!

I have known for ages that GIB completely stinks. I knew it even before - LONG before - I ever played my FIRST game with GIB robots in 2017. I knew it because NUMEROUS bridge players had told me that GIB was pure, utter garbage. And yet in spite of the fact that I have LONG known how rotten and worthless GIB/GIBBO is, it somehow STILL manages to surprise and "amuse" me each and every day (!) with NEW, CREATIVE ways of showing how sickeningly bad it is.

https://www.bridgeba...SK%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

After South made a pre-emptive jump overcall in diamonds (!), why on EARTH is North selling out to 4S??? And...of COURSE...having insanely sold out to 4S, the ignorant piece of trash leads a CLUB, the suit his LHO opened! TREMENDOUSLY stupid, but not at ALL surprising for a GIBBO robot, since these clueless dolts (the worst "bridge players" of ALL time) have a pathological HATRED of leading "partner's" suit and a perverse LOVE for leading ENEMY suits.

GIB/GIBBO rots. It is the laughingstock of the bridge world. It is abhorrent.

https://www.bridgeba...H3%7Cpc%7CDK%7C