[benellis58]

This post will focus on the result at 47 tables, including mine. Later I will make a separate post about what happened on the same board at the same contract but at another table with a different result. First, here is my table (which had the same result as 46 others, with a score pf 68.32%):

West, North, and East are all GIB robots. Given that EW spades are 3-3, NS can and should always take 11 tricks in 3NT, and given that EW have the AK of hearts, NS can and should never take MORE than 11.

I decided to give myself an additional chance at an 11th trick, just in case EW spades were NOT 3-3. Thus, at trick 4, I led a heart from dummy. It could never cost, but it COULD occasionally gain, particularly if the GIB robots erred (as they SO often do).

Well, I ended up taking the expected 11 tricks, so in practice I gained nothing...but the way the two EW morons "defended" I didn't even NEED a 3-3 enemy spade break, because I only NEEDED...THREE (not FOUR) spade winners, as I scored a HEART trick...thanks to the expected and USUAL ineptitude of the GIB robots. Some of the FREQUENT key points of their pathetic, laughable "strategy" (ha...HA...HA!!!) for "defending" are exemplified in this hand. To wit:

Yeah, leads can be guesses and anything can frequently end up being "right" or "wrong", blah, blah, blah, but West's choice of the club 10 (not that it mattered on this hand) seems to have little merit. But more significantly - and here we go AGAIN with a VERY common theme that we've mentioned before: Why do these GIB robots LOVE to return DECLARER'S suit, while at the same time HATING to return "partner's"?

As stated above, to give myself an extra chance in case enemy spades were not 3-3, at trick four I led dummy's heart 8 to East's 6, my queen, and West's ace. What did West do? He IMMEDIATELY fired back his 7 of HEARTS (why the SEVEN - well that's ANOTHER ridiculous story for another time!) because he LOVES to return DECLARER'S suit. East won the king and after I followed with my 3, he returned ANOTHER heart...because he too (also being a braindead GIB robot) LOVES to return DECLARER'S suit. Of course, by then it was irrelevant, because by now I had 11 tricks without even NEEDING four spade winners, since a heart trick had now been established. Since spades happened to be 3-3, the stupid "defensive" habits of EW by chance cost them nothing here, but those exact SAME stupid "defensive" habits DO cost them on numerous hands, and this one was a good way to showcase their stupidity. Next is the link to the hand I just wrote up, and later, as promised, I will describe what happened with this board at another table, so stay tuned for FURTHER astounding stupidity from ANOTHER pair of GIB robot "defenders"!

https://www.bridgeba...HT%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Okay, as promised above, here's what happened at another table on that same 3NT hand. Once again, West, North, and East were GIB robots and South was a human. At this table, and on a different auction, it was NORTH who ended up declaring 3NT.

At this table, North made - wait for it (!!!!!) - all 13 tricks (!!!!!) - against two INCREDIBLY hopeless GIB robot "defenders". THESE two idiots are even WORSE than what the NORMALLY putrid GIB robot "defenders" regularly demonstrate, and that is saying an AWFUL lot!

North has the A8542 of clubs opposite South's stiff king. He manages to score FOUR (!!!) club winners...in his three NO TRUMP contract without ever losing even a single club (as he discards his fifth club). How does he do this? Simple: EW clubs were 5-2, with West having the doubleton 107 and East having QJ963. East, a GIB robot, thought it would be wise to discard down to a STIFF QUEEN OF CLUBS (!)...despite the fact that North had OPENED ONE CLUB! Spoiler alert: Sorry, Mr. East, but...it WASN'T wise!

North took all 13 tricks, scoring five top diamonds, four "top" spades (given the 3-3 EW split), and...FOUR clubs (thanks to the sublimely "BRILLIANT" EW "defending" by the GIB robots.

Every time I think I have seen ALL the stupid things the GIB robots do, I am proven wrong, because they then TOP themselves with something SO new and so INCREDIBLY and CREATIVELY stupid that it surprises even me! They are STUNNINGLY bad. If there was a Bermuda Bowl for HORRIBLE play, I think the GIB robots would "win" it every time it was played!

https://www.bridgeba...HQ%7Cpc%7CHA%7C

[benellis58]

In case anyone hasn't noticed, I'll just mention that I am unimpressed by the bridge "skills" of the GIB robots.

[benellis58]

Typically "brilliant"..."defending"...by the GIB robots sitting East-West:

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/nedn347c

[benellis58]

Even WORSE "defending" THIS time by the hopeless GIB robots sitting East-West:

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/yckp25fm

[benellis58]

And...still ANOTHER example of completely HOPELESS "defending" by the GIB robots. Here, East is BEGGING his "partner" West for a diamond ruff, but West smiles and says, "Not a chance in HELL, 'partner'. After all. I'M a...GIB robot!"

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p82u5fu

[benellis58]

At the point the GIB robot sitting North cuebids 5D, he is looking at two little clubs and KNOWS that his partner South does not have the ace of clubs. He chooses to cue anyway, obviously showing interest in possibly going to SIX hearts, perhaps if South has the KQ of clubs or a stiff club.

Okay, perhaps, but even if THAT action is reasonable, after his partner (who has SEEN and PARTICIPATED IN the entire auction) SIGNS OFF in 5H, surely it is FOLLY for North to now UNILATERALLY raise himself to six. With the combined NS holdings, sometimes 6H WOULD make, so perhaps we could say that North was mildly unlucky that the AQ of clubs were both offside, but personally I think North got what he deserved for his "solo flight". Yes, it was unlucky that South's club king-jack combination could not hold the NS club losers to one, but who said that South even had to HAVE the king of clubs?

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/5n7d7knb

[benellis58]

West, North, and East are all GIB robots. The first question is why North would do ANYTHING other than simply PASS South's 2H.

Next, look at the ludicrous GIB definition for North's ludicrous 2S bid: "5+ hearts, 8+ HCP, 8- total points". First, this has the idiotic, incorrect issue that PLAGUES so many GIB definitions, namely that "total" points can be equal to or greater than HCP, but CANNOT be less, yet this pathetic definition incorrectly implies the reverse. Pure sloppiness. Second, maybe...just MAYBE...it would make sense for a call of two SPADES to be saying SOMETHING about...DUH (!) ...SPADES! Define it as short spades, long spades, no spades, weak spades, strong spades, spades from Mars...whatever the GIB honchos want...but MAYBE "spades" should be in SOME way about...uhh...SPADES! What PLANET does GIB "logic" come from? (And remember that this hopeless GIB philosophy and ridiculous GIB definition would not even have come to light in the first place if the GIB robot sitting North had just made a normal PASS of 2H!)

The human South had heard the auction and had read the (twilight zone) definition of 2S, but opted to PASS anyway, because A. He had great spades himself and hoped North might have at least a SEMBLANCE of a spade suit that might actually have JUSTIFIED a 2S call, B. He KNEW NS had no game, and at this point was just hoping to survive the board as unscathed as possible, and C. When playing with a GIB robot it is very often best to halt the proceedings at the first sign the robot is about to go off the rails.

The RESULT ended up being fine, as NS scored NINE tricks in the 4-2 spade fit, for plus 140 and 100% of the matchpoints on the board, but that does not alter the point that it was foolish of North to bid ANYTHING over 2H, that the GIB system here is a pathetic joke, and that the GIB definition of 2S is, as is SO often the case, VERY poorly written. And just in case you were wondering, I somehow think that the EW GIB robot "defenders" might not have been eligible for a Bols Brilliancy Prize with their performance.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p84uppj

[benellis58]

The GIB robot declarer finds a way to lose SIX tricks, but I hope everyone remembers that declaring is by FAR the best part of the bridge game for GIB robots! Here his declaring "skills" allowed him to achieve a matchpoint score of...ZERO.

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/yckrzbt9

[benellis58]

I was astonished - ASTONISHED, I tell you - to see the GIB robots sitting EW put up such a spectacularly poor "defense".

Okay, you saw through me. You caught me. I'm sorry. I confess: I wasn't REALLY astonished. In fact I wasn't surprised at ALL! That type of hilarity is what I EXPECT whenever GIB robots are "defending".

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p8pbdzd

[johnu]

benellis58, on 2025-December-09, 21:31, said:

I was astonished - ASTONISHED, I tell you - to see the GIB robots sitting EW put up such a spectacularly poor "defense".

Okay, you saw through me. You caught me. I'm sorry. I confess: I wasn't REALLY astonished. In fact I wasn't surprised at ALL! That type of hilarity is what I EXPECT whenever GIB robots are "defending".

https://tinyurl.brid...se.com/2p8pbdzd

Good defense by GIB to hold the contract to 9 tricks. I don't see any way for GIB defenders to take any more tricks than they did.